Being Average

I think there's a lot of what I do that amounts to being your average guy. I work hard doing what I do and I have my pastimes to fill in the gaps. The problem is that I don't want to be defined by those pastimes or have the work I do come from someone average. I'm beginning to feel like what I do isn't enough.

I write anywhere from a few hundred to several thousand words a day depending on the project, but I don't feel like I have set aside the time to read as much as I probably need to. I think it's time to admit I conquered my dyslexia where my writing is concerned, but I still struggle with reading. I think a good pair of glasses and some patience would do me wonders.

To that end I think I need to move some of what takes up my time down the line. I need to engage my time more authoritatively. Playing video games, scrolling through Facebook, reading online comics, and watching streaming video on Netflix each take up a very small amount of time and money depending on whether I really need to escape. Collectively, all the small things I do to recreate take up a lot of time that adds up.

This is especially true if your goals are lofty.

Some of what I do requires that I read a lot tech blogs, gadget sites, and other online resources and I've trained my mind to quickly absorb what I need while ignoring what I don't. Would it hurt my work if I cut the number of sites I read regularly in half? Probably not.

Then there is the time I spend preparing for my table top RPGs. 2 out of the three tables contribute directly to my work, while the third is Basic D&D run from a used Cyclopedia. I miss my box sets. This seems to be the most balanced situation. A two-thirds, one-third split of my energies.

I'm generally good at budgeting my time, but I give myself time off for completing tasks early instead of moving on to the next project. I'm either not challenging myself enough, or I sell myself short thinking I won't be able to do a particular thing without great difficulty.

It all adds up to something.

I need to make some difficult choices and make some changes in how I look at what I do both on... and off the clock.